As we attentively read the gospel reading for the feast of the Immaculate Heart of Mary (Luke 2:41-51), we see that Mother Mary's heart was a pondering heart. Even when she does not understand many things (during the Birth of Jesus or when Jesus is lost and found), she holds (keeps) them in her heart and “ponders” over them. In fact, the Lucan gospel reports, “Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart” (Luke 2:19) and once again, almost repeating the previous verse, Luke states, she treasured all these things in her heart” (Luke 2:51).
Pondering is holding things in one’s heart; it is standing before “life’s great mysteries the way Mary stood before the various events of Jesus’ life, including the way she stood under the cross.” Mary stands at the foot of the cross, accepting the reality of her Son who has become a “criminal,” a “sinner.” Mary does not abandon her criminal, divine son; she does not expect a premature closure of this paradox. “When Mary stands under the cross of Jesus and watches him die—and there is absolutely nothing she can do to save him or even to protest his innocence and goodness—she is pondering in the biblical sense.” As at Nativity, also at the foot of the cross she wonders, ponders amidst heightened suffering. She does not curse God, she does not give up hope. The answer will come one day. She holds the contradiction of her son in incredible tension. Her suffering heart, “pierced by the sword,” holds the irreconcilable elements in creative tension, hoping that out of this tension will be born (created) an answer that she herself cannot author, a resolution that will be given (created) from above. As Ronald Rolheiser puts it, “The type of mysticism that we most need today to revitalize our faith is precisely this kind of pondering, a willingness to carry tension as Mary did.”
Do you have any confusion in your lives now? Anything that is not going according to plan? Treasure them in your heart. Ponder over them. The deeper meaning of those things will be born only later, if you allow it. God has a plan for you; He has a message through every event that is happening to you right now, right here. You will be able to find Him, His love amidst confusion and darkness. This is faith, hope and love given you in a single snapshot. Are you ready for it?
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